There are not many hotels in the world about which apocryphal stories abound, but such is the status of the Burj that we could fill this book with them. Do you hear the one about former US President Bill Clinton sneaking into kitchens? Or the man who feels like a diver in the giant aquarium with an engagement ring and a sign that says ‘marry me’? Do we really believe that it was built on its own island because it was originally intended to be an offshore super casino? Regardless of what you choose to believe, one thing is definitely true: this seven-star superstar is the building that single-handedly put Dubai on the map.
Love it or loathe it, many Christmas albums include at least one photo since it opened in 1999 (our favorite is the Burj-as-natty hat photo). The structure, which sits 280 meters (918.6 feet) from the shoreline and is accessed via its own bridge, was designed by architect Tom Wright to be iconic; his philosophy was that an emblematic structure should have only three or four simple lines so that people would easily remember it. He certainly did it: more than any other structure, this is the symbol of modern Dubai. A double-skinned Teflon-coated sail covers the exterior of the building, and it was the first time such technology had been used vertically and to such an extent anywhere in the world.
At 321 meters (about 1,053 feet), the hotel remains the tallest all-suite hotel in the world. The interior, by Khuan Chew of KCA International, is perhaps responsible for the love-it-or-hate-it aspect of the Burj; It’s certainly over the top for western tastes. What you see from the outside gives little impression of the ocular assault that awaits you inside. If we were nice, we’d call the world’s tallest atrium a ‘wow’ experience. There’s no reception as such, just a couple of inconspicuous desks (well, what passes for inconspicuous in a place adorned with 1,590 square meters, or nearly 17,115 square feet, of 24-karat gold leaf).
This is because each floor has its own reception. Two elevators flanking a central dancing fountain take you past the huge aquariums to the first floor, where another fountain periodically spews water four levels into the air. The bottom of each floor fans out and is painted a different color, similar to a massive Pantone chart. The rugs are migraine-inducing, all fixtures and fittings shine gold, and the furniture is primary-color faux fur. It’s not inconspicuous, but we dare you not to get attached to all the glitter of it all.
Of course, the hotel is aware of the tourist attraction that all of this is, so if you want to experience any of this, you’ll need a reservation for one of the restaurants (they recently installed a man with a phone at the door so that people that are presented according to the specifications can reserve right there). All the staff are incredibly polite, conscientious and always present, as they should be, with a ratio of eight to each guest. The suites, all duplexes, continue the almost opulent theme of the comedy. The living room, with guest bathroom, is on the ground floor and features a huge flat-screen TV along with a desk on which sits your own fully-charged laptop and Bond-style touchscreen powerhouse. villain, from where you can open the curtains. , turn on the music, order a martini, or plot global domination (probably). The views, whether over the World Islands or La Palma, are incredible and unobstructed.
Upstairs, the beds face floor-to-ceiling windows, and the TVs facing them can be raised and lowered at the touch of a button. For a more adventurous form of entertainment, mirrors above the mattresses come standard, though these can be covered on request. All bathrooms come complete with full-size Hermes products and a tall mural of Dubai views above the whirlpool tub, which your butler will fill with scented oils, aromatic herbs, or even caviar upon request. If this isn’t pampering enough, an entire floor of the hotel is dedicated to separate men’s and women’s spas, and there’s a private beach and pool (if guests have one complaint, it’s that this is a bit small and no sunbathing until after noon). Obviously, all this luxury comes at a price, and you’ll probably feel it most when it comes to eating. Many people choose to eat in the room; after all, anyone can book dinner at the Burj, but only a select few will be able to pay for dinner in their suite. So the room service menu is littered with phone books, and we encourage you to go off-piste with it: they’re happy to send a chef to cook in your private kitchen and serve you at your own dining table.
The main restaurant is Al Mahara, the ‘underwater’ restaurant (which is actually on the ground floor but has a huge aquarium in the middle), which can be accessed via a ‘submarine’ (i.e. a big elevator with seat belts). The new all-white Asian restaurant cooks up a competent buffet, and the Arabian spot gets rave reviews, but it sure is pricey shawarma (a sandwich-like wrap with shaved grilled meat). If you’re spending more than a few nights there, it’s right next to Madinat Jumeirah (accessed by golf cart) and its multitude of cheaper dining options.
The location is also perfect for the Mall of the Emirates and is ten minutes from the shops and cafes of Jumeirah Beach Residence. But let’s face it: if you spend AED 10,000 a night, you probably want to get your money’s worth and stay in the hotel the whole time.
